Monday 6 February 2012

"Women and cats do exactly what they want , and men and dogs must get used to it"


It's 6 am.  In my semi conscious, drowsy state I can hear Milly meowing at the window. I know it's her because she's the only cat we have that does this. It's pointless trying to ignore her. She's got time and patience on her side and she'll persist relentlessly until I stumble blindly to the bathroom window, lift the fly screen, and let her in. She knows there's a window in the kitchen that's left open especially for the cats. However, being a cat, making life easier for me is not on her agenda.
Once in, you'd expect her to quieten down, but no; she's celebrating her victory and wants everybody to realize she's arrived.  She walks around for a couple of minutes mewing and doing "the cat rub" on the bedroom furniture.
Finally she springs onto the bed, and purring loudly she begins to knead the bedding and claw the white linen. Ouch! That completed, she commences her cleaning routine. Gracefully,(cats know no other way) she straightens her back legs, and one at a time she extends them in the air at ninety degrees behind her head, like some bizarre yoga pose. She does this while delicately, but noisily licking her bottom.
I nude her with my foot. "No Milly, do your ablutions somewhere else. This is my bed".  Not in the least offended, she starts making love to my foot. She nuzzles it and licks my sole with her rough little tongue. She nibbles on my toes and when I squirm she holds my foot still by extending her claws; not deeply enough to draw blood, but firmly enough to stop me moving. Double ouch!
Any hopes I had of falling back to sleep are now shattered.  The real reason for all this attention is simple. Milly wants breakfast. She has me well trained.  Obediently I get out of bed, shove my feet into my slippers and traipse off to the kitchen with Milly, tail straight up, leading the way.  I'd like to think of it as a win, win situation.  After all, I do this because Milly brings me so much joy? No? Given the choice between an alarm clock and a meowing cat, I guess I'd pick the cat. One thing I am sure of is this: You've gotta love cats! They give you no choice!

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